When I have a day off related to being an employee a day off is often combined with a day on which no major decision making is required. It is equated with time which can be spend for relaxation. To recharge the batteries. To recharge the mind.
Sounds nice. And it´s essential. However there are different approaches on how to relax successfully. So the decision which needs to be made related to a day off is: What exactly do I intend to do in order to relax successfully? Is it really relaxing to spend the whole day on the couch with thinking but not really „doing“ something?
The initial trigger
I recognized that „issue“ on some Saturday and Sunday mornings. Wow. You have a whole day for yourself. You can do whatever you want to do. Luxury situation.
But then the day passed as I did not make a clear decision on how to spend that specific day. The point is that I have several interests. So usually on a Saturday or Sunday morning there were up to ten opportunities on what I could do. Which sounds beneficial in first instance became overwhelming in second instance. This resulted in doing „nothing“. With „nothing“ I´m referring to lying on the couch spending my time with thinking. Watching the tree outside of my window. With „nothing“ I´m referring to mindless work like washing clothes, cleaning my kitchen and empty the trash cans. Activities which do not require any brain effort and which are considered as a dull task so that I´m not able to say to myself: I did something.
Yes. It´s satisfying to complete these kind of dull tasks. But it´s nothing that I can give myself credits for. It´s the same like sleeping or eating. It just needs to be done.
So I have to be careful. There´s no doubt that in the past I have spent days like mentioned above. However I do not want to yawn about my own behavior. About my own life. By feeling unsatisfied and not well-relaxed after spending these kind of days I recognized that even when spending a day off I need to make a decision: What exactly do I want to do?
What exactly do I want to do?
In order to manage that successfully I´m trying to implement a kind of an exclusion process. That being said means that if I recognize on a Saturday or a Sunday morning that the whole day will be covered with heavy rain I can immediately exclude a motorbike ride. If I have already spent the Saturday with a huge amount of sports activities it´s likely that on Sunday I will not decide to repeat Saturday´s sports activities.
Furthermore it´s my intention to avoid working on the laptop on the weekend unless there is something which needs to be done. It´s not an easy decision. There are so many things which can be progressed with. But I know that this kind of work is not that kind of relaxation for which I desire. What I´m seeking for is a positive distraction. Something which is totally different from working on the laptop in a concentrated manner. At least I know that mindless dull tasks do not fulfill the requirements in terms of positive distraction. I need something which stimulates my body and my mind in an alternative way.
How to manage a day off
I experienced that in order to manage that successfully it´s beneficial to leave my current environment. Meaning at least to leave my apartment. When I spend whole weekends within my apartment usually I will not feel relaxed afterwards. I´m thinking of tasks like heading to a different city or long walks in the nature. Extended bike rides. A whole day of swimming at the beach. I want to focus more on these kind of tasks. In most cases these kind of activities have served me well in the past. The good thing is that these kind of activities are totally contradictory on how I spend my weekdays. It´s a positive distraction as it requires effort.
But I recognized that I actively need to make the decision to do so. In the past sometimes I simply forgot to do so. I was just thinking about: Yes. It will be nice to head to that city now. But it´s already afternoon. Probably getting to late. During breakfast I simply forgot to actively decide: I want to go to that city today. So I spend the whole day with completing tasks which were „left“ in the afternoon. Reading a chapter of that book which I´m currently on. Going for a minor run. Going for a short walk as part of my known environment. Playing the guitar just for fun. Nothing which requires effort. Tasks which are part of my usual behavior. Tasks which are inherent part of myself hence they do not serve as that kind of positive distraction which I´m seeking for.
How to experience positive distraction
In order to experience positive distraction I have to challenge myself. Crossing the border. I have to recognize that even when being faced with a day off decision making is required. It´s not okay to fully switch off my mind e. g. by lying on the couch after breakfast and letting the day pass by. The point is that sometimes I simply forget to decide actively on what I want to do. It´s unsatisfactory. Nothing that recharges my batteries. It´s taking more energy from my mind rather than I receive in return.
The importance of active decision making
I assume that this kind of quality („active decision making“) becomes even more essential when working as a freelance consultant. Being an employee does not require any decision making in terms on how to spend the day. Yes. During work I´m faced with a variety of difficult situations which require decision making within a constant manner. But in the morning I´m aware that I will head to the office and that I will return in the evening. It´s nothing that requires an active decision.
But working as a freelance consultant will lead to a change in terms of the working environment. No one will tell me at which time I have to be present at the office. If I will not be able to actively decide in the morning that I want to focus on my work today the likelihood is very high that the day will pass by achieving only 20% of what I could have achieved on that day.
Instructions
That´s one reason why I do not have an issue by receiving instructions in general. I provide my best results as part of a structured framework. When I´m completely on my own I will provide 20% in an excellent and outstanding quality and forget about the other 80%. In order to achieve my future goals it will be essential to choose the right instructors. People whom I allow myself taking control over me. Because I´m aware of the overall benefit. People who will benefit when I achieve my goals. People with „good intentions“.
I have figured out an opportunity in order to generate a selection of instructors. I´m thinking of creating my own Master Mind group. Likely to focus on self reflection and self development. No „hard“ business skills. The intention is to enrich my mind with ways which have already been walked and to obtain further information on how to walk on these ways safely. In contrast I will provide my sight in terms of self development. Providing my knowledge related to the power of routine. Additionally I´m good in detecting blind spots on others. These kind of tasks I consider as precious to engage as part of a Master Mind group. It´s not my intention to give up my structured framework. I know about my strengths and my weaknesses. I have to focus on my strengths but I need to handle my weaknesses. Otherwise I will be lost.
Essential wisdom
By working as a freelance consultant I will be confronted with a „day off“ every single day. A day which requires actively decision making. On which it´s not appropriate to switch off my mind and just go with the flow. A day which will be turned into success solely by following a structured framework in a disciplined way.
Sounds challenging. But I´m aware of the essential core of that phrase so it needs to be emphasized. By following that approach a „day off“ will be satisfactory. Spending satisfied days will support the benefit of sticking to a structured framework in a disciplined way. Positive circulation. Initiated by positive distraction.
Any thoughts on this can be sent privately to send@realthoughts.me or publicly via the comment function below
Martin